A New York styled rooftop venue in the heart of the City of Gold, Jozi.

I went to a rooftop event in Braamfontein last week at a fairly new, up-market venue called Randlords. It was a private event for a company’s most valued customers, but none of that is really relevant.

I’ll walk you through it from the beginning. It’s a typical jozi styled building, the ugly sand brown that was the new black in the 70’s! A typical underground parking graced with the smell of dead rats, and the old cheese that was left to catch them (probably the C.O.D). A friendly guard walked us to the lift, which we took to go up to ground floor then having to take a private lift, with only the number 22 and G as the options, to the top floor where Randlords is situated. A private lift, I like!

Now this is where it all starts as you enter the most stylish venue I have seen in South Africa. If there were only one way to describe it, it would be: New York. Glass, steel, wood, and cement being moulded together in your mind by the upbeat lounge music conducting the proceedings. Served with cocktails as we walk in, I struggle to sip on it, as my jaw won’t lift up. There are low couches scattered in setting accompanied by little raw wood side “tables”, I didn’t want to put my drink on them though, just in case! Black mirrored ceilings give volume to a long room with outside areas on either side. I take a walk to the left area, pass more couches and a peculiar light-piece that had random objects like power tools coated in white plastic in a hanging formation. I walked outside and the one aspect I should of initially noticed hit me, the view. Living in Jozi majority of my life I had failed to notice the true beauty of this beast. The outside area has an upper open top story adorned with more couches and chill areas providing a 360 view. I strolled back inside with a grin on my face realising that this is the place I have been searching for when I was introduced to a few business people whom I had no interest in what-so-ever. One man in particular saw my excitement, as I kept spinning my head so as not to miss a single detail, and casually said, “You have to check out the gents pisser! Come, I’ll show you.” I was hoping that I would not become the latest addition to rape statistics. I fixed my posture, squeezed my bum cheeks together for extra precaution and proceeded down the stairs to the coolest pisser I had ever seen. Taking a leak on a great view was something new, as you aim for a ceiling-to-floor window!

What’s left to say? Well Randlords is so trendy that they make taking a pee somewhat of an attraction.